January Surviving tips from a friend

Here are January surviving tips from a good friend of mine.

• Avoid saying "I m broke because its everyone's chorus"
• Ladies: Cut off your hair short and make an excuse "its so hot this summer". Yet knowing you can't afford hair products
• Guys: Always tell your friends you don't drink Jack Daniel's anymore, you rather go for a Spin, Reds or Black Label. Yet knowing that you can't afford expensive alcohol.
• Smokers: Whenever ones says "skyf / skeyf". Be free to tell them you are on the process of quitting smoking.
• Church goers: When the pastor / reverend says "its time for Free Will Offering". Start a hymn that would easily destruct his enthusiasm.
• Workers: Whenever your colleagues go for lunch, take a walk or be pined in your computer as if you have a due date.
• Learners: Stop caring cigarettes and gamble in the school premises you might make your principal a Smoke addict and a Rich man.
• Drivers: Please make sure you obey all the road signs and rules, even white traffic officers are bribable this time of the year.
• Employers: All employees taking sick leave must produce a doctor's certificate even if its a one day or half day sick leave.
• Robbers: Its of no use to grab ladies' handbags, they are fool of toilet papers, half fulled lip-gloss, cutexes and nail polishes.
• Lovers: Avoid personalizing your callmes as "recharge me", "no money", this might put your affair at stake.
• Family: Refrain from eating your meal whilst sitting in the porch (stoep), it might not be appetizing to the neighbourers.

NB: Did you know most credit cards, installments and stop orders are likely to bounce in January.